Eh tu, Bacon?

Bacon.

Bacon could be the world's most perfect food. It's salty and melts in your mouth. It's appropriate for breakfast, lunch or dinner.  You can wrap it around just about anything for a perfectly basted bit of awesomeness.

I (heart) bacon.  Unless it looks like this...

You can make it too!

Seems tasty until you can't photograph it well.

You can make it too!

Despite looking like a pile of internal organs, I'd make this.

You can make it too!

Mushrooms

Mushrooms.  Not just a fun-guy! 

 Mushrooms are "not my favorite".  My mother taught me this very useful phrase, "not my favorite". It means something like, "this food makes me want to barf, but I'm going say so politely."  I have taught my four children children to say this.  #3 still just says, "I hate this food."  She'll catch on.

Back to mushrooms.  They are NOT MY FAVORITE.  To me, they are like dirt-flavored Jell-o.  Which is kind of appropriate really.

Which brings me to one of my favorite collections of Pintresting Food Fails: mushrooms.

It's one thing that mushroom taste like dirt-flavored Jell-o, but it's another thing to actually encapsulate mushroom in dirt-colored Jell-o.

You can make it too!

I feel bad for home-chef-food-bloggers.  Not only do most have no photography skills, but they have no food styling skills. So when they make a saucy dish, it looks like baby poop to me.  (I also do not possess said skills, but I am perfectly capable of making fun of said bloggers, so there.)

You can make it too!

Have you ever found an enclave of snails under your landscaping? No? This is what is looks like.

You can make it too!

Sorry to offend the more sensitive of sentiments, but these are just phallic.  And gross.

You can make it too!

And then I saw this, sweet respite.  Good for something mushrooms!

You can make it too!

The Cutest Little Foods on Pinterest

Cutest Little Foods on Pinterest

Sundays are reserved for finding the cutest little foods on Pinterest.  This celebrates food well prepared and well photographed. Yay!

Hot dog bears!

You can make this too!

Easter is coming!

You can make this too!

Hello, Panda!

You can make this too!

  

Stuffed Peppers

Stuffed Peppers.

No one likes these.  Trust me.  The filling is usually a tasteless combination of rice and ground beef, covered in a layer of melted cheese.  The bowl is a soggy, mushy pepper.

Now if you are going to "pin" a Stuffed Pepper recipe, at the very least, pin an appetizing photo.  Not like these:

Oh you poor pepper!  Someone even put a hat on your soggy head and you still look awful!

You can make it too!

See, I told you...melted, cheesy and bonus: bad lighting.

You can make it too!

Did someone stuff these with cinnamon raisin oatmeal?

You can make it too!

OMG, I am really making an effort to find a "pin" of an appetizing looking stuffed pepper, really, I am.

You can make it too!

Oh no!  These have a massive, festering head wound, somebody stop the bleeding!

You can make it too!

Finally, a well photographed stuffed pepper recipe...that I still will probably NEVER make.

You can make it too!

What is a "Pinteresting Food Fail"?

Where I nabbed this photo

C'mon folks!  We all know why websites like Pinterest exist.  It's a virtual visual orgy of photography.  Women, and some men, gather these photos or "pins" to a collection or "board".  Most organized women (and some men) give their boards useful title such as "Recipes" or "Crafts I'll Try".  Others just use the generic board names given by Pinterest.

I confess, I have a collection of boards and pins.  I adore Pinterest.  I have found many great ideas on Pinterest.  Oh the recipes I have tried!  Oh the recipes that I have failed.  But then, there are those bonus recipes, the ones that I will never try because they just look horrid.

Sadly, some food just does not photograph well.  This blog is dedicated to recipe and food photo failures that I have found on Pinterest.

(Pinterest Tutorial)